You know it's difficult to become a writer.

inspiration only strikes you at a moment, and if words can capture the thoughts of that tiny fraction of a second, it could fill up an entire book. At that single moment, only the author can fully understand and appreciate the impact, or implication of his thoughts. Surely, he will think that it will make a great read, but then there is the problem of actually writing it down in a form that is understandable to everyday people like us. Occasionally, a writer manages to overcome those obstacles and get the job done, but only to find that his hardwork may not even reach the local bookstores or magazine vendors.

Lord of the Rings nearly didn't come into existence, because publishers were unwilling to print a book that is 1000 plus pages long, and had obvious allegories with regards to the war that was going on at that time. What's more, it started off as a children's book, but with themes much too dark to fit into that category. Because of publishers, many great ideas and potential classics were cast aside, left to fade into oblivion. Not everyone is as lucky as JK Rowling.

the reason why i'm saying all these is because i experienced so many strange and funny thoughts at Jurong Point POSB, and many of those thoughts faded away when the day ended, which i thought was quite a waste. So i began to write down some of the interesting stuff on a piece of paper. Jian An says this is a trait of psychos, writing down their anger and frustrations, and then bottling it up, only to unleash hell when the anger resurfaced. That thought actually is quite frightening, that i'm actually a psychotic murderer in the making =), but hell with it la... this murderer has (i hope) an ok sense of humor. And since i'm my own publisher in a blog setting, this will be published. ok maybe i'll publish the funny stuff in POSB in my next entry, this entry is long enough as it is already... haha...

ideas came popping into my head while i was on one of my long runs a while ago. Took a little jog from Choa Chu Kang To bukit timah, then to lot one and finally came back in 1 hour 19 minutes. To the cross country runners, this is like a joke i know, but i felt good about the entire run. "the pain is almost cleansing", as Lance Armstrong would say. It was not really painful, but a kind of self reflecting run, to put things in perspective. I remember how we used to say why some people dedicate so much time punishing themselves, doing mindless running for super long distances FOR LEISURE. They must be mad!! Let me tell you that it is quite an experience to be by running by yourself. Not competitively, but just by yourself. You have all the time to reflect on your life, and there is not so much of a distraction as of the occasional chio bu passing you by. You feel in control, and you will discover much more about yourself than any OBS or School can ever teach you.

So i was talking about ideas right? in fact many bad ideas came into my head. "Stop, u are going too far already", "why don't you take this shortcut back home, since you are so tired", "u can't run so far without progressive training, stop now or you may faint and die". Trust me, i wanted to stop and just walk back home from bukit timah(near beauty world) countless of times. but i keep going, with Lance Armstrong in my head. (Sorry for quoting him so many times. I just read his book and i'm quite impressed) He said "i never quit". So i told myself that i'll not quit. I must admit that it takes discipline to run a pre-planned route ALONE. No one is going to breathe down your neck, check if you are not taking shortcuts or even cheer you on to complete the run. You are answerable only to yourself. So for this run, i managed to accomplish what i set out to do, and i am happy.

Reading my entry alone won't let you guys discover anything. Why not u guys just go try it out for yourself. Run a long route at your own comfortable pace, and realise for yourselves what i mean. Of course you can be a cynic and laugh at my suggestions, i'm ok with that. I'm beyond that already. But i just want you guys to find out that running isn't just to keep your body healthy, it keeps your mind, and to a certain extent, your soul healthy as well.

---Mian---