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Friday, March 24, 2006
2:15 PM


Botak Shot-Stopper to miss next game...

Botak's in form shot-stopper Cong is set to miss the next match against AJC old boys on 26 March due to his comittments in organising sunday's Singapore Biatholon.

Also featuring on the un-availability list are:

Mian - canoeing with babes (as usual)
Andy - embarked on his backpacking trip to SEA, haf fun n rem to wear helmet n see u again in may dude!
Choo - representing in some inter-constituency badminton tournament, a victory will help boost his GRC in the upcoming elections
HB - aspiring Doc needs to mug for his up n coming finals as he proved once again to be pass-shy in his last CA

TEAM NEWS

Monday, March 20, 2006
11:48 PM

guys try to keep sunday 26 MAR 3-5pm free..match again zhiwei's ntu hall team at canberra..once book alr i'll let u all noe..now pls revert on availability!
jian

Sunday, March 19, 2006
4:27 PM

BOTAK 2-1 Hwa Chong Old Boys

Isac scored from the corner flag inside the first quarter of an hour, with the visitors knocking in the equaliser just after the break after a defensive lapse in the Botak defence, before Choo scored an emphatic brace in the death as Botaks recorded three succesive wins at a canter.

Botaks pressed from the kick-off, with Teoh and Junwei presented with early scoring opportunities, but the HC goalie did well to deny their efforts. The impressive Hatta was giving HC a run-out and their back four full of problems the entire match.

With less than a quarter of an hour gone, Isac scored from the corner flag as his deliberate cross sent the ball into the net.

To their credit, HC did not let their work-rate drop, but too often both HC striker saw promising runs checked by the solid defence- Nas, sim, mian and myself, haha. And deep in the first half Choo of all people conceited a penalty. But the impressive Cong was there to save Choo's blushes as he stopped the HC striker's shot on the line with ease.

Botaks continued their prongs of attacks in the second half which saw Nas header denied by the post. However, HC equalised with NO.18 scoring a powerful curler from outside the box.

Choo Stakes Claim

But in the dying seconds, Choo capitalised on a weak HC back pass and lashed a powerful left foot curler which beat the goalie to score an emphatic win for the Botaks.

Mian who had a clearance off the line believes that Botaks are improving. He told sky-sports, 'The team looks to be getting better and better, and is growing with every game. So overall, it was a very positive game.'

'When our team is leading, I always tell the team that it's still 0-0, I believe it's this mentality that drove the team on. I'm the special one!'

TEAM:
cong, mian, nas, jian, sim, du, hatta, mel, teoh, junwei, isac, dill, choo, andy

match report by JIAN

Friday, March 17, 2006
12:37 AM

Hey guys...

There is art to picking a movie... (not as in picking a movie for the oscars)... I mean picking a movie, even if it's from your neighbourhood friendly vcd pirate, it is a skill much revered in today’s world of endless choices. There are movies which you just watch and forget (eg. Jurassic Park 3), also not forgetting the classics (Jurassic Park 1), and the almost memorable (Jurassic Park 2)… How in the world are we gonna pick out which movie to watch? So I’m here to give you guys and the clueless out there some nifty advices… yes that’s right… you are getting all these free of charge from the GURU of modern day movie himself…

Basically, choosing a movie to watch all depends on CONTEXT. Let me elaborate:

On days when you feel down, and that the world is against you, you need to draw on inspiration. And that inspiration will come from non other than movies that depict victory against tremendous odds, be it physical or emotional victory. The most classic example, and favourite movie of all times for me, would be FORREST GUMP. Nothing in modern cinema can even come close to matching the depth and beauty of that show. Not even Underworld, or Blade, or Scary Movie. Of course if you are in the mood to watch top notch actors pretend to be retarded, do not miss the following: Rain man by dustin hoffman, I am Sam by that guy, and Arnold in Batman Forever as Mr Freeze.

Movies also allow you to draw inspiration for other purposes as well.

1.) When your team is on a losing streak for soccer matches, and you are hoping for a miracle, watch Shaolin Soccer (the scene when “Da Ge Hui Lai Le”, and the monks start to fly and the keeper starts to hold on to the goal post with one hand, sitting crossed legged)

2.) When You wish to Sing KTV like a real pro, watch Shaolin Soccer (especially the singing scene)

3.) When you are having constipation, watch Jurassic Park 1 (the scene when the guy tries to shit in a toilet, but was too slow and was chomped on by the T-Rex)

4.) When You wanna suddenly adopt a Son, watch Star Wars (the infamous scene)

5.) When You need new lines to insult somebody on a soccer field after that person is being kicked in the butt, watch Brokeback Mountains (Shaun taught me this, of which I am eternally grateful)

6.) When you are just in it for a good laugh, watch anything that is very serious, and laugh at how serious the actors look. Just kidding. SO many movies that are out there to make you laugh until you get cramps. The BEST unintended laugh I had in the cinema was with Keith and the rest. We were watching Infection, the jap horror show… couldn’t stop laughing.

However, I must hereby clarify that humour differs from person to person. More so if the other party is of the other gender. Here are some examples:

1.) Imagine a scene where a cat sits on a toilet bowl, and is having a serious bout of diarrhoea, and it is like making funny cat faces, with sound effects of gas release which are obscenely loud and unbelievably long (DATE MOVIE). It is hilarious I tell you, but she will say “what the hell was that?”

2.) Imagine a scene where the actors sing a song, and with people dancing to it (DATE MOVIE). Very plain and ordinary. You will probably be dozing off, but looking beside you, you find her laughing her head off…

3.) Imagine a scene where the leading actress finally found someone who believes in her conspiracy theory, only for that someone to be sucked into a UFO hovering in the sky. “Yes I believe you… I really…” *sucking sound*…*sucked into the sky with arms waving frantically* (THE FORGOTTEN, starring Julianne Moore) There is no escaping stomach cramps for this one, but she might probably give you the blank look and say “SSHHH….”

As such, my final piece of advice will be never to watch a movie like DATE MOVIE with a girl. One reason is that she will absolutely be turned off (how not to be turned off with scenes like the fat girl having her boobs twisted to her back?) Secondly, you tend to suppress your laughter, because being the perfect gentleman, you cannot be seen laughing at spastic actions or nonsensical gestures or even obscene noises. However, you will not be able to take it because such movies are filled with scenes that will make you roll over. Lastly, when the show is over, you ask her how it was, and she will patronize you by saying “it’s ok”, when it is obvious, by looking at her eyes that she meant “What a waste of time”.
PS: if you are watching it with a girl whom you have known for ages and is already attached, then it is no fuss. Just apologise for the bad movie pick at the end of the day, and during the screening, laugh your ass off regardless.

---mian---

Monday, March 13, 2006
9:27 PM

BOTAK 3-0 JJC team

JJC avoided a landslide solely because the Botaks spurned at least half a dozen golden chances as the home team cruised to aa richly-deserved victory.

In the JJC goal, the makeshift goalie was giving a passable impression of a coconut shy as missiles rained in from all angles. Bravely he stood firm and denied the Botaks their chances and the first half ended goaless.

But there was nothing he could do to deny Rhihan his best chance early into the second half, which came when Nich swings in a diagonal ball from his leftback position and Rhihan was onto the ball in a flash, skipped past the last man and drilled the ball home. Nich celebrated his assist of the season in style!

Midway through the second half, a delicate touch from Isac allows Du to find himself space in the penalty area and he side-footed the goalie with ease.

In the dying seconds of the match, HB scored a clinical header from the corner as he rose above the last man and the keeper. His double in two matches and this guy is on a roll.

Shaun who was on the sidelines with a sprained ankle described his team's performance as 'exhilarating' but admitted the failure to take any more of the multitude of chances they created meant they could never fully relax.

Shaun told Sky Sports: 'We could have scored more - we should have.'

TEAM:
cong, andy, jian, hb, nich, du, hatta, mel, rhihan, junwei, isac, dill

jian

Saturday, March 11, 2006
12:05 PM

TEAM NEWS

yuchong, nich, nas, hb, andy, mel, shaun, jian, du, junwei, isac, dill, choo

the following guys are unavailable..
liang - kl
ks - bintan
sim - extras to clear altho he ord on mon
mian - kayaking

Thursday, March 09, 2006
6:45 PM

ANNOUNCEMENT

from the tone tt u guys replied to revert on attendance for this sunday match i can smell tt all ur legs are god damn itchy n cant wait to get into action..so this sunday's game is confirmed...3-5pm canberra sec

we're playing against a psyched up JJC team..which i heard they're pretty pacey n strong..but no fret cos we're gonna KICK SOME ASS

so be there this SUNDAY 12 MARCH 3-5pm

MRT boys 2.15 be at sembawang mrt n i'll give u all a lift..e rest be there 2.30 for warm up..LATE COMERS WILL BE SEVERELY DEALT WITH by disciplinarian MIAN

jian

2:06 PM

guys tk note...

match tis sunday 12 mar 06 3-5pm opponents alr confirmed so now issac in the process of booking field...so psych up n throw away all other commitments..will update u all once pitch confirmed...meanwhile pls reply to revert on attendance NOW!!!

urs truly madly deeply,
Glenn Roeder

Wednesday, March 01, 2006
5:02 PM

ok mian juz came to my shop...n so we decided to upload some of his sister's father in law's ex fishing fotos...so all be geared up for tis trip 6-8apr..see u there!

the 5star cabin where we gonna spend the 2 nights in

woah look at the catch..eat until u lao sai man

look at his expression n u noe fighing is sheer fun man

the 5star luxury cruise!!!

3:57 PM

eh im opening shop now...n im feeling bored as business is not always good...so i decided to write about 10things u can do to irritate ur customers..

1) ignore ur customers when they ask for assistance..go talk on the fone or buy some makan..dun give them the notion that u need them to buy ur things

2) when give ur customer his goods..purposely take out a few items from the box..he will be fuming when he later discover abt it a home

3) purposely short change ur customer n if he realise it..tell him ure playing a prank on him..if he never notice, still tell him n say ure playing a prank on him

4) it's sure irritating when a customer keeps bargaining..tell him it's the lowest price..if he keep bargaining, charge him even higher

5) tell all ur customers that everything they wan is the last piece..so they got no choice but to take the display..do it for a day

6) when customer call n ask for assistance, tell him ur boss is not ard n tell him call back 5min later..when he call again..say the same thing..repeat until desired

7) purposely write the wrong date of delivery on the invoice..n deliver on the wrong day..if customer wan to complain to ur boss..u got the invoice to save ur ass

8) wear a mask to work ie. wear the osama mask n sit on ur desk while u wait for customers..do the explode action when they step into ur shop

9) say 'i don't know' when the customer ask u the price to anything in ur shop

10) when ur shop is crowded w customers, sneak behind n off all the lights and create a blackout

i juz had an old customer who ask me how to fix on some shelve so i decided to demo to him..den he at the side keep saying i noe tis i noe tt..den he say 'i noe everything but juz dunoe how to make the shelve'..corny right..

jian

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